The Retirement Plan is a comedy action film written and directed by Tim Brown. Nicholas Cage is in the lead role as a seemingly aging beach bum named Matt, who lives in the Cayman Islands. Other cast members include Ashley Greene as Matt’s estranged daughter, Ron Perlman, Jackie Earl Haley, Ernie Hudson, and Grace Byers. There’s a cute kid played by Thalia Campbell, who may actually be the best thing in this film.
Ashley and her husband run afoul of some ultra powerful crime syndicate, and she sends their daughter to the Cayman Islands to meet her grandfather for the first time. When Ashley is forced to take some of the bad guys to her father’s doorstep, she finds that he had a secret past that led to their rift. It seems Matt is not as inept as he first appears and was at one time a government assassin. When the granddaughter falls into the hands of one of the henchmen, Matt dusts off some of his old skills to make sure he does not lose another opportunity to reconnect with his family.
There are some actors that can make eccentric characters rather charming and fascinating. Cage didn’t hit that mark here. Matt just seems a little weird, although the fight scenes were pretty good. The film kept getting interrupted by this one second flash card effect every time a new character was introduced. The villains were more like caricatures. Byers had a couple of almost chilling moments as a crime boss lady named Hector. Haley and Perlman were the peculiar killers sort of in the lead of those actively hunting for this elusive hard drive with some unspecified important information that is supposed to change the world or upset lots of people. I sort of lost track of what was so significant about this thing.
Thalia Campbell plays the granddaughter who gets caught up in this caper involving her sketchy parents. Her scenes with were her newly met grandfather were kind of charming. Most of the film has her in the company of Ron Perlman, who plays the lead henchman who kind of kidnaps her. I think I would have preferred her to have more scenes with Cage.
Anyway, the film is pretty campy but falls short on overall charm. It was supposed to be somewhat comedic, but it was kind of dull. The dialogue wasn’t all that creative. The bungling antics of the bad guys were just a little too stupid for my liking. Somehow, Cage’s character, who could have been more interesting, just didn’t hold my attention.
Overall, there are a couple of very mild amusing scenes, however this is another exercise in relentless mediocrity. That really is a shame because there is some real talent here that ended up being wasted. Hopefully, Brown isn’t kicking around the idea for a sequel.
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